10 ways to agree on the discipline of children

If you and your partner have small differences when disciplining their children, you do not have much to worry about. Children can easily be adapted to these small differences. For example, a child knows that mom quickly upset when spoken to badly, while dad goes crazy when a drink is spilled on the table.

However, some researchers suggest that children, whose parents have different parenting styles very, are more likely to have behavior problems. If Dad and Mom allow everything is stricter than a sergeant, it is very likely that children get confused. 

To help you find strategies that both you and your partner agree, it is essential to talk and decide together the basic steps that will be implemented. Our offers the following ten steps for you and your partner can discipline their children:

1. It is important to talk about how disciplined you your parents when they were children. It is common that we tend to repeat the methods with which we were raised so that will allow them to better understand the parenting styles of each.
2. It questions your partner on your way to discipline, and listen without interrupting. Be patient and respectful. Ask yourself why you object to his methods. What you fear might happen?
3. Ask your partner what objections you have about your way to discipline.
4. Explore all the options they have to establish a plan to discipline their children, and discuss the advantages and disadvantages of each. Establish a set of rules in which the two agree. It is very likely had to review and adjust the rules after a few weeks if they are not working.
5. As they trying new discipline strategies, resolve disputes arising out one by one, in a quiet and privacy where children cannot hear.
6. Agree and maintain the same rules. If small realize that their parents work as a team, it is less likely to put them in situations where they have to face. It is very important not to criticize the way of disciplining your partner in front of children.
7. If you suspect your child is trying to be a showdown between you and your partner (“Dad always let me clear the table after the film"), tell him you will take a decision once you talk to your dad. You can also indicate that you have to get the "yes" from both parents before proceeding. And remember that not all questions of discipline require an immediate response.
8. If your partner is discouraged (if you're not completely agree on how to handle the situation), offer incentives and support. Find a quiet place to say, kindly and nonjudgmental moment, something like, "How hard was it! You're probably very annoying. You want to talk about it?”
9. If your children already go to school, establish clear family rules with them so that they understand that both parents work as a team. Also, if older children are involved in creating the rules, they will be more willing to cooperate. Over time you will have to review the rules and consequences to adjust according to the growth of your children.
10. What if your partner refuses to talk about it? This situation is not easy, but do not give up. Ask him to make a list of the child's behaviors that drive you crazy, and also write down the ideas you can think about how to solve them.

Remember that if you always want done what you say (“There is only one way to fix it and has to be as I say I"), the two will be caught in a battle zone. Better try to understand the point of view of your partner. In the latter case, give a book or article on the subject, or solicits the help of a teacher, school counselor or therapist.

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